Dear Sam

Han Kyoung Jae Mon Apr 14 2008, 22:27

Hi Sam. Glad to meet you here.
I have a problem now.
I'm so busy that I can't take a rest at home on weekends.
I have to study at the univeersity in the evening and I have to work during the daytime.
So I feel depressed and I get much stress.
If I quit the job or the study, I feel more free and not engaged. But I can't quit neither of them.
What should I do to feel happy and energetic without quiting these things?
Please give me good and wise advice.

from Kyoung Jae

sunnypine Tue Apr 15 2008, 09:18

Kim Jin-Young wrote:Dear. Sam
Hi. It's good to meet you on-line here.
I have a problem about my first impression. I didn't recognize how first impressions were important to make friendships, especially to newcomers.
My face and attitude look a little cold, so some people think that I'm that kind of person. Sometimes, I blamed my uplifted eyes for that reason. At other times, I blamed my shyness that resulted in misunderstanding.
I have tried to express positive action to others since I was advised not to make a stony face. However I don't want to pretend to be always happy. Actually it's comfortable for me to look at somthing without any thought for the time being. Like this.

Hi, I'm Sam.. Wink

I think you are doing great in class. you are always being proactive to everything. Just.. like.. shyness is kinda nature to everyone at first meeting. It's ok, because you are trying to be more active too!! And if one relationship is very deep, then first impression can be changed too! People cannot judge someone just at first sight you know.. So.. dont worry! I'm glad to mee you here Razz

Ji-eun Tue Apr 15 2008, 10:50

Glad to meet you, Sam! I am a troubled girl. I'm second grade of M.A. study and this is my third semester! And since i started this study, i always have some worries about me and my future, 'cause there is nothing clear for my future, yet. After finish this study, i will apply for TEACHER's exam. I have only one years and half for this exam and it means i have to prepare for passing it. As you know, the competitive rate of this exam is getting higher and it is getting more hard to pass it and become a teacher. So i know i have to study and prepare a lot, but the problem is i don't know exactly what shall i do!! Is it right to start to study of Pedegogy now? of study just English? or what kind of study is sutiable for this time for me? I don't have any knowledge of Pedagody and my Enlgish is not good, neither. I have lots of thinkings just like i will do something blabla~ but actually i don't know what is good for me right now.

During my first year, i didn't study at all. Of course i know it's my excuse, but actually i don't have much time to invest for myself. Until now, i work from 9:30 am to 5:30 pm at English kindergarten, and after work, i go to school three time a week, so i come back home around 9:00 pm. (just like other classmates, here.^^) And I am a self-boarding student, i do some cleanings for my house, too. Of course i sincirely want to do my best for school and homework, but sometimes, i just exhasted after finish all i do. It's a kind of contracition. I came here to STUDY but during one year, i didn't study at all and just worked to make money for intuition fee, so this problem always bothers me a lot, like this, "Why did you come here? Why did you start to study M.A course? Did you forget the real reason? "

The point is that i don't want to regret anymore. The last year is enough for me to regret. So i want to live more zealously and for myself! and I want to study for me and for my teacher's exam. Whenever i go to the bookstore, there are lots of books for English, English education or pedagogy, but i can't choose books and i don't know how do i start to stdy.

Dear Sam! Please HLEP ME! What can i do for my English or preparing for my future? I will wait for your help. Sad

Lee Hye Jin Tue Apr 15 2008, 12:13

I easily get nervous or feel small when I have a problem or something unexpected comes up to me. No matter how small it may be(actually I feel every thing appears big for me) I always can't sleep or have a haedache.

For example when I had a test back in my school days, my hands got wet so that I can't hold the pencil, which I recoverd as time went by.

Now a days... I have to show my English class to other English teachers and principals from other middle school. From the moment I heard the news I feel really nervous and feel small and can't sleep deeply... And I can't think about any good idea about the class. What should I do?

Do you have any good idea about my class or any ideas about how I could ease my tense. I need your help Sam...

Lee Hye Jin Tue Apr 15 2008, 12:22

Sounds very tough and feel sorry about it.
I think you need some break. Don't make any plans this weekend and just spend all day for yourself and clean your room , desk and shelves. That can make you feel a little bit up lifeted.

And let's try to use between times(틈새시간?). While you wait for someone or something listen to some songs you like and read books you like and send tex messages for your friends.

And look at yoursefl in the mirror and smile. Then you may feel happy at the moment. I hope this would work for you!

See you~

Han Kyoung Jae wrote:Hi Sam. Glad to meet you here.
I have a problem now.
I'm so busy that I can't take a rest at home on weekends.
I have to study at the univeersity in the evening and I have to work during the daytime.
So I feel depressed and I get much stress.
If I quit the job or the study, I feel more free and not engaged. But I can't quit neither of them.
What should I do to feel happy and energetic without quiting these things?
Please give me good and wise advice.

from Kyoung Jae

choi Eun sil Tue Apr 15 2008, 17:58

Liz wrote:Dear Sam
Hi, nice to meet you.
In my homeroom class, there is a boy.
He is such a nice student who is kind and has a good personality and I like him a lot. Nowadays, it is very difficult to find a student like him. One day, he came to me and said 'I am really poor at English. Although I'm a middle school second grade, I don't even know ABC.' I asked him whether he is getting a help from somewhere else like an academy or tuturing but English classes at school were the only source. I'm sure that he wouldn't understand a bit of the class. He must be so bored! I don't know how I can help him and where should I start. Do you have any suggestions?

Dear Liz..
I also have the students like him.
However I can't find the solution yet.
We have various students, I mean, the student's level is totally different just in one class. So I have difficulty teaching English to students.
Some are good at English, but others are poor at English.
Even they don't know what is subject or object in spite of high school students.
Every time they don't understand, I explain to them more after the class.

Your student is still young enough to start learning language.
So I think you'd better teach the student the elementery course of English.
The easier English is, the more interested he is.
Good luck Embarassed

Ji-eun Tue Apr 15 2008, 18:56

Lee Hye Jin wrote:I think I am a badly organized person. I want to do things as planned and I want to keep my belongings as the way they were. I always forget the place where I put my belongings or document. It always happens. I don't want to waste my time to find things any more.

And I really like to learn or do something new and I easily fall into something. However, it doesn't go long. I easily get bored with things I sarted with passion. That is my problem too. Once I was so into how to bake cookies and cakes, which didn't go long. And then I started to learn balloon art, and I started to watch videos related to that on the Internet . Now I really fell into cooking. I know this passion doesn't go long. What am I supposed to do? I really want to stick to one thing I really like.

Hello! I think you are very similar with me.. haha, so when i read your article, you seem like me! I am one of not-organized people, but i just want to give one tip for you!

How about have a planner everyday? I always write down somethings that i have to do or i have to remember on my planner, and don't forget to carry this everywhere. This small planner always stays in my back. So i can check some important information about me and it is really useful to remember homework or some other things. Every night, i write some events or schedule on the next day part and try to check that i wrote down yesterday. It will be very helpful to you! ^^

And In my opinion, it is good to stick one thing of course, but it is not bad to have interest lots of things, isn't it? Through this kind of personality, i bet you can experience or enjoy many things than other people. I really envy you because if you have some interests about something, you do not hesitate and try it. It's wonderful thing. I think. ^^

Mi Jin Jeong Tue Apr 15 2008, 19:23

Liz wrote:Dear Sam
Hi, nice to meet you.
In my homeroom class, there is a boy.
He is such a nice student who is kind and has a good personality and I like him a lot. Nowadays, it is very difficult to find a student like him. One day, he came to me and said 'I am really poor at English. Although I'm a middle school second grade, I don't even know ABC.' I asked him whether he is getting a help from somewhere else like an academy or tuturing but English classes at school were the only source. I'm sure that he wouldn't understand a bit of the class. He must be so bored! I don't know how I can help him and where should I start. Do you have any suggestions?

Hi, Liz. ^^
I think that you are teaching such a great student, because he really wants to study hard by himself and is trying to find good way how he can do that from you, his own teacher. It would bw important thing that you get him to have interest in English learning and not to be discouraged. Try to make him think mistake are not a shameful or afraid thing.
I hope he is doing better and is not in dispair.
Hope my idea can give you a little help.
Thanks.

Oksun Tue Apr 15 2008, 19:36

Han Kyoung Jae wrote:Hi Sam. Glad to meet you here.
I have a problem now.
I'm so busy that I can't take a rest at home on weekends.
I have to study at the univeersity in the evening and I have to work during the daytime.
So I feel depressed and I get much stress.
If I quit the job or the study, I feel more free and not engaged. But I can't quit neither of them.
What should I do to feel happy and energetic without quiting these things?
Please give me good and wise advice.

from Kyoung Jae

When I read about your desperate situation, it reminded me of the well-known catch-phrase.- "If you can't avoid it, ENJOY it !" I know it's not that easy to live up to but it deserves and will be rewarding . Why don't you think positively? As long as you are not satisfied at your situation and keep grumbling, you'll not live a happy life. Things are up to your own mentality. Cheer up! cheers

You can make it !

jangdj Tue Apr 15 2008, 19:37

bakbann wrote:Dear Sam,

I'm tutoring a 3rd year highschool student. It's been 2 months since I tutored him. Although he is poor at English, he is polite and always respects me as a teacher. Moreover, he was such a hardworking student and did every homework I assigned. I was positive that I could improve his English soon. However, these days, he's not studying as hard as before. All of you know how hard Korean high school student should study. He is still well mannered but often miss homeworks. His mother expects me to enhance his English score in exams as soon as possible. I told him several times not to miss any homework politely but it didn't work. How can I make him study hard again without hurting our respectful relationship?

Remind him he is living in South Korea. I suggestthe best way to stay him motivated is push him hard.
Tell him this competitive society hardly give second chance to loser. Much of our life is hinges on how much you did last year of high school. Sad but True. At this moment you teach him as a eldert person rather than good hearted teacher..

Mi Jin Jeong Tue Apr 15 2008, 19:48

Oksun wrote:Dear Sam,
I'm a woman in trouble. Fifteen years have passed since I got married. We have children. My husband is a sports nut.-he is crazy about all kinds of sports. My family rarely went anywhere for a vacation or a holiday, since he didn't want to miss a football, baseball or basketball game on TV. Whenever we are in the car, he insisted that the radio should be tuned to a game. Conversation was allowed only during commercials. My children who are not interested in sports have nothing to talk to their father. I asked my husband to do things with me and my children for a recreation but he ignored!! I thought I could change him but I failed. What shall I do ?

Frustrated

Hello, Oksun.
I feel sorry to hear your family story. Crying or Very sad

I think it's valuable to have conversation and to do something with family members because the family can understand each other and share many things such as their daily life and recent concerns by doing that.
Now, your husband is SO much into sports thing! Even ignore what you and your children are saying.
I guess you already tried to let him Know you didn't like it.
Um...How about ignoring him, too.
Don't pay attention to what he says, and just say 'Yes or No.' with your usual tone, not bluntly.
No specific words or explanations.
Then he would ask you if anything is wrong, tell him your feelings and thoughts gently.
I am sure it would work.

Kim Jin-Young Tue Apr 15 2008, 20:01

Frankly, I'm not a good advisor about this kind of matter, but I thought that we were in the same situation. Like you, I have two private teachings. One student is really excellent and he learns English very fast. Sometimes, I feel surprised at his acquisition speed. However, the other one is very tough. That means that she has a little perky personality. That factor sometimes overwhelmed me!
However, after the winter vacation ended about 2 months ago, two students got busy studying other subjects. Of course, they missed their homeworks and easily felt tired during the studying time.

The age around high school students is mature enough to know how to handle their study, so I usually advise them to do it by the next studying time. I never scolded them for missing their homework, but I showed that I fully understood their hard situations. Very often, I said like that way. However, I let them know that if they don't study as I ordered, the outcome will attributed to themselves.

Of course, it's case by case. It means that what is important depends on your student conditions. I would like you to know that just find out his or her study taste, so to speak, just imagine that if you were in his or her shoes, what do you want to listen to?

bakbann wrote:Dear Sam,

I'm tutoring a 3rd year highschool student. It's been 2 months since I tutored him. Although he is poor at English, he is polite and always respects me as a teacher. Moreover, he was such a hardworking student and did every homework I assigned. I was positive that I could improve his English soon. However, these days, he's not studying as hard as before. All of you know how hard Korean high school student should study. He is still well mannered but often miss homeworks. His mother expects me to enhance his English score in exams as soon as possible. I told him several times not to miss any homework politely but it didn't work. How can I make him study hard again without hurting our respectful relationship?

jangdj Tue Apr 15 2008, 20:33

One day I was walking down the street. then I encounterd a blue-eyed person. White, male, seemed he is Canadian backpacker judging from Canadian flag on his back pack. He approached me and asked direction. So what do you think I did? I replied in very gently and kindly in Korean. Why ? I could not find any reason to speak in English for his convinence but I could find every reason to do the otherwise. Sometimes I think their (especially people who came from English Speaking country) lingustic attitude toward local people is pretty upsetting and lack of respect to local people. Something isn't right. isn't it?
An argument may start here. However,at that time, on the street, direction asking situation, it was not language lab ,not a convention,and not a business meeting situation. Why I would do that?
Definetly we are not living in the world everyone speaks Engish. I thinkthat guy grumbled about communication things later on because He belived he was living in the world everyone speaks his language.

Once I read interview article with a english teacher from U.K. He said that he couldn't find toilet because no one could not understand simple sentence "Where is the toilet?" soon after he touch downed. And then he criticized koreans' poor lingustic proficency. "What a jerk!" I thought, He introduced himself as a certifcated teacher with B.A degree which means he is educated. I was perrty upset due to his rude and inappropiate utterance. Don't you think it is smart enough learn survival or supermarket language before you go somewhere and that is etiquette toward local people?

Jason Renshaw Tue Apr 15 2008, 20:51

jangdj wrote:One day I was walking down the street. then I encounterd a blue-eyed person. White, male, seemed he is Canadian backpacker judging from Canadian flag on his back pack. He approached me and asked direction. So what do you think I did? I replied in very gently and kindly in Korean. Why ? I could not find any reason to speak in English for his convinence but I could find every reason to do the otherwise. Sometimes I think their (especially people who came from English Speaking country) lingustic attitude toward local people is pretty upsetting and lack of respect to local people. Something isn't right. isn't it?
An argument may start here. However,at that time, on the street, direction asking situation, it was not language lab ,not a convention,and not a business meeting situation. Why I would do that?
Definetly we are not living in the world everyone speaks Engish. I thinkthat guy grumbled about communication things later on because He belived he was living in the world everyone speaks his language.

Once I read interview article with a english teacher from U.K. He said that he couldn't find toilet because no one could not understand simple sentence "Where is the toilet?" soon after he touch downed. And then he criticized koreans' poor lingustic proficency. "What a jerk!" I thought, He introduced himself as a certifcated teacher with B.A degree which means he is educated. I was perrty upset due to his rude and inappropiate utterance. Don't you think it is smart enough learn survival or supermarket language before you go somewhere and that is etiquette toward local people?

I'm not sure, but this doesn't exactly seem like a question from you to our collective "Sams" to suggest solutions for... You might like to rephrase certain aspects of it so that it is presented as a problem that classmates can then try to address.

Otherwise, you are of course welcome to express your opinion on an issue by starting a separate post in a new thread. I think you raise an interesting issue (albeit perhaps a little too harshly in places - but that's just my opinion), but I'd like to see what your classmates think before I offer any of my own viewpoints.

Best wishes,

~ Jason

***

jangdj Tue Apr 15 2008, 21:01

Jason Renshaw wrote:
jangdj wrote:One day I was walking down the street. then I encounterd a blue-eyed person. White, male, seemed he is Canadian backpacker judging from Canadian flag on his back pack. He approached me and asked direction. So what do you think I did? I replied in very gently and kindly in Korean. Why ? I could not find any reason to speak in English for his convinence but I could find every reason to do the otherwise. Sometimes I think their (especially people who came from English Speaking country) lingustic attitude toward local people is pretty upsetting and lack of respect to local people. Something isn't right. isn't it?
An argument may start here. However,at that time, on the street, direction asking situation, it was not language lab ,not a convention,and not a business meeting situation. Why I would do that?
Definetly we are not living in the world everyone speaks Engish. I thinkthat guy grumbled about communication things later on because He belived he was living in the world everyone speaks his language.

Once I read interview article with a english teacher from U.K. He said that he couldn't find toilet because no one could not understand simple sentence "Where is the toilet?" soon after he touch downed. And then he criticized koreans' poor lingustic proficency. "What a jerk!" I thought, He introduced himself as a certifcated teacher with B.A degree which means he is educated. I was perrty upset due to his rude and inappropiate utterance. Don't you think it is smart enough learn survival or supermarket language before you go somewhere and that is etiquette toward local people?

I'm not sure, but this doesn't exactly seem like a question from you to our collective "Sams" to suggest solutions for... You might like to rephrase certain aspects of it so that it is presented as a problem that classmates can then try to address.

Otherwise, you are of course welcome to express your opinion on an issue by starting a separate post in a new thread. I think you raise an interesting issue (albeit perhaps a little too harshly in places - but that's just my opinion), but I'd like to see what your classmates think before I offer any of my own viewpoints.

Best wishes,

~ Jason

***

I think I had misunderstanding about this forum, I just wanted two share what I experienced and wanted to listen to what others think. I admit that this piece of writing is inappropiate to what this " Agony Aunt section" supposed look like. Could you remove it if it is avaliable?

Ji Young, Kim Tue Apr 15 2008, 21:12

Dear Sam,

I have a very bad habit. As far as I remember, I've always had this habit since I was very young, so I simply don't know how to get rid of it.

My problem is that I always put off the things I have to do until the last possible moment!! I don't want to be a irresponsible person, so I usually finish my job just before the deadline. However, I always procrastinate and never start doing my job early enough, so in many cases I don't have enough time to get things done perfectly and find myself just trying to meet the deadline. Of course it makes me really stressed out, but I repeat same mistakes again and again.

If I can't get out of this awful habit, definitely I will be in big trouble sooner or later!!

What should I do??

-from a very frustrated chronic procrastinator Crying or Very sad

eunjin39 Tue Apr 15 2008, 21:51

Kim Jin-Young wrote:Dear. Sam
Hi. It's good to meet you on-line here.
I have a problem about my first impression. I didn't recognize how first impressions were important to make friendships, especially to newcomers.
My face and attitude look a little cold, so some people think that I'm that kind of person. Sometimes, I blamed my uplifted eyes for that reason. At other times, I blamed my shyness that resulted in misunderstanding.
I have tried to express positive action to others since I was advised not to make a stony face. However I don't want to pretend to be always happy. Actually it's comfortable for me to look at somthing without any thought for the time being. Like this.

Dear Jin-young Kim,

Hello. Thank you for sharing your story with me.
I think most people worry about their first impression around the time that they meet new people.
In your case, I think all you need to do is a little bit of effort on your face.
Plastic surgery?
No way!!
Then??
Well, how about starting to smile from this moment?
I know you smile and it's not a big thing to do. However, what I mean is that you can smile to the new people.
I think smiling makes people feel friendly toward the smiling people.
I know it could be awkward and uncomfortable, but practice makes perfect!
Don't forget that and just try it. Later, you'll see the difference!
I hope this can help you.

Sincerely,

Sam

bakbann Tue Apr 15 2008, 22:39

Ji-eun wrote:Glad to meet you, Sam! I am a troubled girl. I'm second grade of M.A. study and this is my third semester! And since i started this study, i always have some worries about me and my future, 'cause there is nothing clear for my future, yet. After finish this study, i will apply for TEACHER's exam. I have only one years and half for this exam and it means i have to prepare for passing it. As you know, the competitive rate of this exam is getting higher and it is getting more hard to pass it and become a teacher. So i know i have to study and prepare a lot, but the problem is i don't know exactly what shall i do!! Is it right to start to study of Pedegogy now? of study just English? or what kind of study is sutiable for this time for me? I don't have any knowledge of Pedagody and my Enlgish is not good, neither. I have lots of thinkings just like i will do something blabla~ but actually i don't know what is good for me right now.

During my first year, i didn't study at all. Of course i know it's my excuse, but actually i don't have much time to invest for myself. Until now, i work from 9:30 am to 5:30 pm at English kindergarten, and after work, i go to school three time a week, so i come back home around 9:00 pm. (just like other classmates, here.^^) And I am a self-boarding student, i do some cleanings for my house, too. Of course i sincirely want to do my best for school and homework, but sometimes, i just exhasted after finish all i do. It's a kind of contracition. I came here to STUDY but during one year, i didn't study at all and just worked to make money for intuition fee, so this problem always bothers me a lot, like this, "Why did you come here? Why did you start to study M.A course? Did you forget the real reason? "

The point is that i don't want to regret anymore. The last year is enough for me to regret. So i want to live more zealously and for myself! and I want to study for me and for my teacher's exam. Whenever i go to the bookstore, there are lots of books for English, English education or pedagogy, but i can't choose books and i don't know how do i start to stdy.

Dear Sam! Please HLEP ME! What can i do for my English or preparing for my future? I will wait for your help.

Sorry, this is not an advice, but I'm writing because you have exactly same problem with me. I can never overstate how competitive and tough the exam is. Although it has been my long dream to be an English teacher, I haven't studied English education before. I studied English language and literature at undergrad. I took only several education courses at college. I have no idea how to prepare for the exam to be an English teacher. Question

Is there anyone who can give some advice? Plz~

Jung Yoojin Tue Apr 15 2008, 23:08

Dear Kurt,
Hello this is little Sam. As I read your problem, you must feel so hearted about that student. I am not a teacher but I would like to give some advice for you.
I know there are several students who works so hard but they couldn't pay their good records back. If you are a teacher of him, you need to encourage him oftenly in a positive way. I don't mean to sympathize him. Sometimes student wants to be encouraged by teachers especially with cared mind. I had an experience when I was high school. I studied hard but the test records were not good enough. My teacher asked me to come his office alone, and he encouraged me , gave some brave to me. When I heard his warm sentences, I feel I will do my best than before. Finally , I got good score on the test. So, I mean encouragment and giving some motivation is the most important to young students. And there is another way to teach him. Even though he studied hard, he could not get his proper score it means to me he might not know his studying skills. Why don't you give some strategies to study each subjects?
Teach him with metacognitive skills such as planning his studyings, or self-evauation, etc. It could help him to have his self-esteem and study more efficient way.
I hope those are helpful to you . Take care. And I know you are a good teacher.

Sincerely, Sam

kurt wrote:Dear Sam.

I have one student who have studied English so hard, but his performance has not improved yet. Whenever he took tests, his score remained the same. To see him disappointed is too much for me. What should I do for him?

Lee yujin Wed Apr 16 2008, 05:37

Ji Young, Kim wrote:Dear Sam,

I have a very bad habit. As far as I remember, I've always had this habit since I was very young, so I simply don't know how to get rid of it.

My problem is that I always put off the things I have to do until the last possible moment!! I don't want to be a irresponsible person, so I usually finish my job just before the deadline. However, I always procrastinate and never start doing my job early enough, so in many cases I don't have enough time to get things done perfectly and find myself just trying to meet the deadline. Of course it makes me really stressed out, but I repeat same mistakes again and again.

If I can't get out of this awful habit, definitely I will be in big trouble sooner or later!!

What should I do??

-from a very frustrated chronic procrastinator

I also have many similar experiences like you and it's really difiicult to get over it.
i think we need to make a plan before getting on the task, which make us possible to examine our process on the task.
Also we have to think about what would be the most important task at that moment, because we seomtimes find oruselves spending time on doning less important things.
I'm not a thorough person and good at organizing, but this try will help us a lot.
Of course I believe this habit is closely related with our personality, but we just can give to a try.

However i think youve alrealy know what you sove the problem, because it's not the matter of the words but the action!! Don't you thnk so?

Lee Hye Jin Wed Apr 16 2008, 06:02

You must be stressed out. Sleeping is a very important portion of your daily life.
Have you told about it to your roommate? He many not notice about it.

Have some chances to talk about it. And then he would try to get some help stop it.

And how about wearing earplugs? I hope you can sleep tight from now on!

Your friend Sam

jangdj wrote:[ I am living in a dorm and of coures I share the room with room mate.
He is nice guy has down to earth personality. But the problem is that he snores with very high pitched sounds.
He kept me awake all the night, but he is best roomate for other reasons. What should I do ?

Kim Jin-Young Wed Apr 16 2008, 06:28

How about saying to him the fact that you rarely get asleep during the nights?
I know that habits during sleeping can not be corrected with ease. However, I think that there is a difference if you inform him of your trobles. Once he is told that trobles caused by him, very often he feel sorry about that. And then, he sometimes talks to you in the morning like this "How was your sleeping? Did I snore a lot? It trobled you? Sorry..." These comments may calm down your anxieties even if you feel much bad.

In my case, I had three roommates when I was a undergradute student. Can you imagine how various types are in one room. I have gone through many trobles...
Sometimes, before assigned to a new room, I prayed a lot not to live with any naughty girls. Although I was senior in a room, I could't say any problems to them. I thought that as I feel some trobles caused by someone, I may give some trobles as well.

If I have to live in a dorm again, I would say some of it, but not to hurt their minds.

jangdj wrote:[ I am living in a dorm and of coures I share the room with room mate.
He is nice guy has down to earth personality. But the problem is that he snores with very high pitched sounds.
He kept me awake all the night, but he is best roomate for other reasons. What should I do ?

choi Eun sil Wed Apr 16 2008, 06:42

Kim Jin-Young wrote:Dear. Sam
Hi. It's good to meet you on-line here.
I have a problem about my first impression. I didn't recognize how first impressions were important to make friendships, especially to newcomers.
My face and attitude look a little cold, so some people think that I'm that kind of person. Sometimes, I blamed my uplifted eyes for that reason. At other times, I blamed my shyness that resulted in misunderstanding.
I have tried to express positive action to others since I was advised not to make a stony face. However I don't want to pretend to be always happy. Actually it's comfortable for me to look at somthing without any thought for the time being. Like this.

Dear Jin-young
I understand your problem.
I also have heard other people saying I look cold at first.
but I think the first impression doesn't matter.
As time passes, people have come to know your truth.
Time is a great healer. Embarassed

Mi Jin Jeong Wed Apr 16 2008, 06:56

Dear Jinyoung

I also totally understand what you worry about your first impression and totally agree to prior Sam's advice. When I was in high school, I heard many times that I had steely eyesand cold impression. Other students including my good friends said it was not easy to talk to me at first at that time. I didn't recognize how my first impression was until my friends let me know about it, so I was a little embarrassed at that time. Then, I tried to smile whenever I talked to someone else and listened to others making eye contact.
You might feel awkward by yourself at the first time, but it's getting better and more natural. Now I smile well. ^^

I hope my tips can help you.
Thanks.

Siscerely,
your Sam

kiera wrote:
Kim Jin-Young wrote:Dear. Sam
Hi. It's good to meet you on-line here.
I have a problem about my first impression. I didn't recognize how first impressions were important to make friendships, especially to newcomers.
My face and attitude look a little cold, so some people think that I'm that kind of person. Sometimes, I blamed my uplifted eyes for that reason. At other times, I blamed my shyness that resulted in misunderstanding.
I have tried to express positive action to others since I was advised not to make a stony face. However I don't want to pretend to be always happy. Actually it's comfortable for me to look at somthing without any thought for the time being. Like this.

Dear Jin-Youmg
Hi, Jin-young. I read your letter and I totally understand your problem.
I myself used to heard a lot others saying that I looked a little bit cold.
Here's one suggestion.
Try to smile as many times as you can. Here. smile means smiling eyes.
Especially, if you are meeting new comer in classes or in works, try to show your enthusiasm as much as possible. For example, appropriate eye contacts.
However, try not to make a fake smile.
I think it's better doing nothing than pretending.
I hope this suggestion would help you.

sincerely,
Sam

Mi Jin Jeong Wed Apr 16 2008, 07:29

kurt wrote:Dear Sam.

I have one student who have studied English so hard, but his performance has not improved yet. Whenever he took tests, his score remained the same. To see him disappointed is too much for me. What should I do for him?

Hello, Kurt.

I have the same experience to yours. One of my students in the 3rd grade high-schooler, the most important period in his life in Korea, studied very hard, but he didn't get good score on his tests and his English wasn't improved. I felt pity for him and needed to find out good idea to help him.
In my opinion, it is imprtant to encourage him not to lose his confidence and to keep studying hard. I think he himself has noticed he is in the same place depite his all efforts to get good score on his tests. Discouragement is the worst thing ever.
And try to know how he studies and if there is something wrong what he have done to study. If there were the wrong ways, you could correct them for him. You can recommend your secret methods to your student.

Thanks.

Sincerely,
Sam

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Dear Sam

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Dear. Sam!

Sam... Help me..

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Dear Liz

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Cheer up !

Remind him he is living in South Korea.

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I always procrastinate!!

Just Simple

I have an exactly same problem.

I am not a teacher but I think you can do this!

I also have similar problems like yours.

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big problem.

Dear Jin young

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